Top Ten Dunks of the Year

Javale gettin his

JaVale Mcgee, single handedly keeping this blog alive.  Crazy decision making, and that celebration...THAT'S SO JAVALE

Lamar Odom smater than Jonas Valanciunas

Let's get this out of the way before I go on.  I'm sure you're looking at this and thinking, "Jesus Christ, man, why don't you suck his dick already?', but if K. Smooth keeps doling out the hits, what's a guy supposed to do?  He's become THE VIP up in da club and club employees have strict instructions to make sure he never even has to SEE the velvet rope.

Last night he was back on his grind and making Khloe Kardashian's husband look like a BITCH.  Lamar Kardashian did not even attempt to challenge K. Smooth in the air.  Probably a smart decision as Smooth has taken no prisoners when attacking the rim in his career.  Although a smart decision, Lamar cowering like that makes me 100% certain that Khloe manhandles him at home.  Poor little guy.

Gotta love the way Smooth blows past Matt Barnes at the top of the key like he's not even there.  Great D from a guy that has made a career out of playing defense.

The Best Player in the League Throwing Down

Another European being victimized by K. Smooth in one of the most aggressive dunks you will see this year.  Yikes.

K. Smooth Doing The Blake Power Layup

Holy bejesus.  The European Center adage rings true once again.  These guys just love the poster publicity. 

No Ibaka last night?  No problem.  K. Smooth threw up 41 points on 15/30 from the field and didn't turn the ball over once in OKC's 102-90 win at Phoenix.  I am officially starting the Kevin Durant for 2013 MVP campaign right now.  Jump on board or end up with a boo boo.

Uncle Drew, K. Smooth and CP3

Some highlights from the last few days. 

First off is Uncle Drew's ridiculous elbow fade away with 1 second left to bury the Bobcats on Friday night.  I think sometimes people forget this guy is only 20 years old.  Can't even enjoy a legal shot of Cuervo with his buddy, Milk Chocolate.  Unbelievable upside.

Also on Friday night, K. Smooth baptized the softest marshmallow in the league, Spencer Hawes. I will never understand how 7 footers can look themselves in the mirror when they get dunked on like this.  Not only did you let K. Smooth tap his nut sack on your forehead, you fouled him.  If you are going to foul him, at least stop him from abusing you.  Spencer Hawes, a waste of 7 feet.

Last but not least, the Clippers figure if it ain't broke, don't fix it and go for back-to-back-to-back CP3 to DeAndre Jordan alley oops.  For a reason unknown to me, I hate CP3 with the fire of 1,000 suns, but god dammit he is good.

Good Evenin' Bitches

I would personally like to thank Club Bosh for the opportunity to hate on all you hoes, markass marks, trickass marks, punk bitches, skip skaps, skanks, and scallywags.

Now that the Club has been graced with my presence, I only have a few things to say. First, keep my name outcha mouth. Dont event think about asking bout my kids, it aint yo problem. Finally, anybody know of any Tony Montana type muthafuckas in da club? I'm always lookin to party.

Well if you got the goods .. step over to my table. If you aint got none, feast yo eyes on me embarassin bitches..
 
SHAWN KEMP TOP 10 THROWDOWNS

Weekend Jams

Moe Harkless is lucky he didn't get the patented Metta elbow after being on the receiving end of a dunk like that from the artist formally known as Ron Artest.

Ya boi, K. Smoove, with the thunderdunk over the shitty Lopez brother.

Last but certainly not least, Smooth J and Jeremiah got theirs over 14 year old, Gordan Hayward.

Harrison Barnes Wakes Up Da Club

Holy shit.  Dunk of the year candidate here.  Harrison Barnes baptizing Nikola Pekovic, his wife, his mistress, his first born, his dog, his 2 cats, his oldest daughter's hamster and his best friend on this dunk.

The Golden State bench went a level of apeshit not scene since DeAndre Jordan's WTF! reaction to Jamal Crawford's meg.

Trying not to be outdone, the brown sugar ginger threw down a megadunk on Zaza Pachulia that made Jrue Holiday blush in Philadelphia.

Once again, the main theme of these videos?  Average, European centers playing the role of doofus in posters that in short time will be hanging on the walls of 10 year olds all over the country.

Mavin Williams Baptizes Jonas Valanciunas

I know this is a day late, but the NBA's favorite new whipping boy, Jonas Valanciunas, is back at it again.  Dude just loves being dunked on.

European Centers Scream "Dunk On Me!"

In honor of K. Smoove's Thunderdunk last night on Valanciunas, we decided to put together a compilation of some of the best balls-in-your-face baptisms of European Centers.  What is it about those tall drinks of water that makes them so poster friendly?

Back when Shaq was the most dominant player in the world, The Daddy himself over Muresan: 

The Black Mamba over Arvydas Sabonis in the 1999-2000 season:

Trevor Ariza over Marcin Gortat in 2010:

DeAndre Jordan dunking on everyone's favorite punching bag, Pau Gasol:

The most famous dunk (power layup) of the last few years, Blake Griffin over Timofey Mozgov from last season:

And the most famous of them all: USA vs. France in the 2000 Olympics in Sydney; Vince Carter over 7' 2" Frederic Weis:

And just for good measure, even though he's not European, here's a video of the top 10 dunks on Shawn Bradley:

Have you no shame, Mr. Bradley?

Thunder Get Their Shit Together, Raptors Lose Lowry

The Thunder finally managed to turn things around and get a win last night against the mighty Raptors. Russ-Russ led the way with 19 points and 8 assists (and more importantly, only 1 turnover), while the Raptors struggled to contain the Thunder offense. A bigger problem for the Raptors than dropping to the the 2-2 Thunder was losing Kyle Lowry, who has had probably the hottest start to the season than that guy that the Thunder traded that they definitely won't miss at all. Lowry was averaging over 23 points a game, and was pretty much the Raptors only chance of making the playoffs (they sure as shit aren't getting there with Jose Calderon or John Lucas III running the point). He went down on a freak play after a Jonas Valanciunas bucket. Speaking of that Lithuanian lout, he got baptized by K-Smoov....

Teague Thunderdunks on K. Smoove

The Thunder laid an egg last night (with the exception of Kevin Martin, who was brilliant, finishing with 28 points on 8-11 shooting including 6-8 from 3).  21 turnovers leading to 31 Atlanta points to go along nicely with giving up 12 offensive boards leading to 16 points.  The sloppy play needs to be fixed like yesterday if the Thunder want to get anywhere close to their 2011 campaign.

Without getting too deep on another Westbrook needs to shoot less and pass more rant, Westbrook needs to shoot less and pass more.  My reasoning: K. Smoove finished with an impressive line of 22 points on 7-17 from the field with 12 boards, 8 assist, 3 steals and 2 blocks.  Full disclosure: he also had 6 turnovers.  You're thinking, what does that have to do with Westbrook, right?  Well Russ Russ finished with 14 points on an abysmal 5-18 from the field with a season high 9 assists and a season low 3 turnovers.  There were at least 4 shot opportunities that Durant passed up to try to play facilitator to get the rest of the team involved.  Durant is the best scorer in the world.  He should NEVER pass a shot up to facilitate.  Westbrook should be the one focusing on facilitating, not taking 18 shots and shooting 27%.  Obviously, finishing with 9 assists, Russ Russ did do his share of facilitating, but if he took 5 less shots and fed the hot hand of Kevin Martin or Smoove, the result of this game could have been drastically different.  My point is that Russ Russ needs to pick up earlier in the night if his shot is off and use his explosive speed to draw help defense and dish the ball to the open man.  Instead of doing that, right now he ends up throwing up wild layups or off balance shots.  It's not working and its becoming more evident now that Smooth J is out of town and Westbrook is handling the point even more.

Another issue that is starting to bubble to the surface in OKC is internal conflict.  For the second game in a row Sefolosha and Russ Russ had to be separated.  Ibaka took some heat from Smoove on the way into the locker room at half about a board he didn't grab and also from Poppa Perk every time they didn't come away with a rebound.  The role players on this team need to fall in line.  Everyone should be looking to Smoove as the first in line and Russ Russ as his Secretary (until he ups his play, I'm not referring to him as the Vice President).  No one else on this team should be talking.  Period.

Oh and Jeff Teague has been bringing the hammer dunks this year.  Smoove fell victim last night after Teague blew by a flat footed Westbrook on the perimeter.  Sorry, Smoove:

LOVE the description of that video.  "Teague baptizes Durant."

Suck it, Lebron!

This proves it.  Andre Drummond is faster, quicker, bigger and more athletic than Lebron James.

Unfortunately, that's not true at all.  All this video proves is that Drummond can throw down a reverse alley oop with the best of 'em.  All this game proves is that the Pistons still could barely beat a college team and the Heat are still going to be title contenders.  Final score 105-78. 

Disclaimer: I don't actually think a college team could compete with the Pistons.

Maybe I Spoke Too Soon About The Jazz

So with Kevin Love now out 6-8 weeks for being Mr. Tough Guy during a recent workout, my prediction of Minnesota being the surprise team of the Northwest Division is shot to shit.  A couple days ago, Jeremy Evans, who won the weakest dunk contest in history last year, put in his two cents about who will supplant Minnesota as that surprise team.  This video leaves me with: 1) Why is Ronny Turiaf taking a 19 foot jump shot in the first place? 2) Gonzaga Turiaf made me believe in underdogs, NBA Turiaf makes me hate them. 3) I think if Jeremy Evans stood at the 50 yard line on a football field, he could touch both field goals.

Credit for the find: Left Coast Pete

Sundays With Scottie

Sticks his dick in Ewing's face and then goes after Spike Lee. I love it.